Main PageRead How to Cope without carrying pot to Campus
Skimming through the topic, most probably what flashes
through your mind is "How is that possible", Of course it is
very possible if you know how to manipulate your ways, but
get ready to succumb to one, more or all of the following
conditions :
Get Ready To Spend : Since you are feeling somehow too
huge to lift a pot and strike a matchbox, get ready to stroll
into the abode of mama put and spray some cash to get some
stuffs into your ever-worried belly. This is not an easy task
though, imagine you eating three times with a purchasing
power, calculating it at a rate of #200 per meal if you are not
a glutton affiliate, summing up to #600 per day, invariably
#4,200 per week and an aggressive aggregate of #16,800 in
a month!! COME! Grab a seat and sit next to me, how much
is Nigeria's minimum wage??Leave that aside, how much
does it cost to set up a pure water factory somewhere at the
backyard of this street?? Imagine you saving that sum for a
couple of months, my guy you are already a business man.
Ruminate on that. Shoutouts to those guys that do the
cooking, not all of you do not have the money to spend but
it's cool to plan your future right from time.
Get Ready To Beg : You know blue blood is not running
through your vein and you don't want that pot to leave a
black spot on your skin?? Then let me give you some tactics
on how to survive without doing the cooking,by begging.
Go to Youtube and download a couple of Basketmouth
comedy videos, cram as many as possible, this might take
you days to do so. Wake up and scout the person that is
cooking out, walk up to him and give him a friendly
handshake while you shout " My Surest Dude! How Your
Night Na", avoid the usage of pure English so it won't sound
like you are forming phonetics, do not leave the guy's hand
after the handshake though, keep shaking him like he just
won golden boot and you are to present it to him, then
sharply look around for a circumstance that will befit one of
the jokes in your head, throw the joke in the air and laugh
hysterically as you crack it, remember, laughter at times
stimulates laughter… The condition is straight, if you are a
dry comedian, you cracked it at the wrong time, or your joke
doesn't seem funny , then you need another means of getting
food. Else, he laughs and probably other roommates join in
the process, I must say "You don hammer!", just sit back and
wait for the food to get done, then echo the statement "Guy I
dey chop o", you have a 70% chance of eating part of the
food. Just note that this tactics wont last you more than five
times before they get to know the kind of human being you
are.
But why should you go through the whole long process of
If's and Else's like you are writing python syntax, just for
something as simple as "Eating", it will soil your dignity for
sure and very soon they will start insulting you with the
punchline, they might even compose personal anthem for
you, depending on the category of roomies you have in your
possession.
So, get off your high horse, head to the market, get some
food stuffs and COOK!!!
Get A Rich Girlfriend : Laughter flows through my pen as I
hold it tightly and script down this point. It has no
guarantee, but just in case, it must be mentioned but no
details. When a typical girl nowadays won't follow you for a
stroll if you don't get her something like suya to mix her
saliva, then you will need to offer her the heart of Mother
Theresa before you make your own offer of "Cook For Me".
She will definitely have to love you, and if you are not
loveable, then this option is not meant for you, scroll to the
next. This will definitely affect your dignity as well and it
will hardly last long as someone close to the girl will one
day mention "This your boyfriend is broke sha o, na
everytime e dey chop 4 here". Oooops! That's not the best
idea, if you already have this mentality then clear it off your
mind, it's abusive.
Get Ready To Starve : Extracting what starving means, in
case you don't know, it means to suffer severely or die from
hunger, to be undernourished, malnourished and to
experience a concentrated feeling of near-death discomfort
or weakness caused by lack of food, coupled with the desire
to but nothing to eat. No simple British English can describe
it comfortably, everything is huge and scary, for you to
know that starving is not even a considerable option for a
normal human being. You will see books and wont be
unable to read as they will seem like uneatable chops, you
will experience nights filled with nightmares, that's when
you will realize that all cats are gray in the dark, you will
walk on the street and get shaky and dangling in the
direction of the wind like a drunk monk, then you will know
the effect of food on your stamina. But I think at that
moment, nobody will tell you to get a pot before you do,
even if there is no cooker, you might decide to place it under
the hot sun, that's when you will realize that food is the
enhancer of human brain.
Conclusively, all points made but the fact remains the same
and it's obvious it's not easy surviving without cooking on
a Nigerian campus, it's always better to do, it saves your
spending and also reduce your dependency.
through your mind is "How is that possible", Of course it is
very possible if you know how to manipulate your ways, but
get ready to succumb to one, more or all of the following
conditions :
Get Ready To Spend : Since you are feeling somehow too
huge to lift a pot and strike a matchbox, get ready to stroll
into the abode of mama put and spray some cash to get some
stuffs into your ever-worried belly. This is not an easy task
though, imagine you eating three times with a purchasing
power, calculating it at a rate of #200 per meal if you are not
a glutton affiliate, summing up to #600 per day, invariably
#4,200 per week and an aggressive aggregate of #16,800 in
a month!! COME! Grab a seat and sit next to me, how much
is Nigeria's minimum wage??Leave that aside, how much
does it cost to set up a pure water factory somewhere at the
backyard of this street?? Imagine you saving that sum for a
couple of months, my guy you are already a business man.
Ruminate on that. Shoutouts to those guys that do the
cooking, not all of you do not have the money to spend but
it's cool to plan your future right from time.
Get Ready To Beg : You know blue blood is not running
through your vein and you don't want that pot to leave a
black spot on your skin?? Then let me give you some tactics
on how to survive without doing the cooking,by begging.
Go to Youtube and download a couple of Basketmouth
comedy videos, cram as many as possible, this might take
you days to do so. Wake up and scout the person that is
cooking out, walk up to him and give him a friendly
handshake while you shout " My Surest Dude! How Your
Night Na", avoid the usage of pure English so it won't sound
like you are forming phonetics, do not leave the guy's hand
after the handshake though, keep shaking him like he just
won golden boot and you are to present it to him, then
sharply look around for a circumstance that will befit one of
the jokes in your head, throw the joke in the air and laugh
hysterically as you crack it, remember, laughter at times
stimulates laughter… The condition is straight, if you are a
dry comedian, you cracked it at the wrong time, or your joke
doesn't seem funny , then you need another means of getting
food. Else, he laughs and probably other roommates join in
the process, I must say "You don hammer!", just sit back and
wait for the food to get done, then echo the statement "Guy I
dey chop o", you have a 70% chance of eating part of the
food. Just note that this tactics wont last you more than five
times before they get to know the kind of human being you
are.
But why should you go through the whole long process of
If's and Else's like you are writing python syntax, just for
something as simple as "Eating", it will soil your dignity for
sure and very soon they will start insulting you with the
punchline, they might even compose personal anthem for
you, depending on the category of roomies you have in your
possession.
So, get off your high horse, head to the market, get some
food stuffs and COOK!!!
Get A Rich Girlfriend : Laughter flows through my pen as I
hold it tightly and script down this point. It has no
guarantee, but just in case, it must be mentioned but no
details. When a typical girl nowadays won't follow you for a
stroll if you don't get her something like suya to mix her
saliva, then you will need to offer her the heart of Mother
Theresa before you make your own offer of "Cook For Me".
She will definitely have to love you, and if you are not
loveable, then this option is not meant for you, scroll to the
next. This will definitely affect your dignity as well and it
will hardly last long as someone close to the girl will one
day mention "This your boyfriend is broke sha o, na
everytime e dey chop 4 here". Oooops! That's not the best
idea, if you already have this mentality then clear it off your
mind, it's abusive.
Get Ready To Starve : Extracting what starving means, in
case you don't know, it means to suffer severely or die from
hunger, to be undernourished, malnourished and to
experience a concentrated feeling of near-death discomfort
or weakness caused by lack of food, coupled with the desire
to but nothing to eat. No simple British English can describe
it comfortably, everything is huge and scary, for you to
know that starving is not even a considerable option for a
normal human being. You will see books and wont be
unable to read as they will seem like uneatable chops, you
will experience nights filled with nightmares, that's when
you will realize that all cats are gray in the dark, you will
walk on the street and get shaky and dangling in the
direction of the wind like a drunk monk, then you will know
the effect of food on your stamina. But I think at that
moment, nobody will tell you to get a pot before you do,
even if there is no cooker, you might decide to place it under
the hot sun, that's when you will realize that food is the
enhancer of human brain.
Conclusively, all points made but the fact remains the same
and it's obvious it's not easy surviving without cooking on
a Nigerian campus, it's always better to do, it saves your
spending and also reduce your dependency.
Thanks For You Reading The Post
We are very happy for you to come to our site. Our Website Domain name
http://gurusfanz.blogspot.com/.
Newer Posts
Newer Posts
Older Posts
Older Posts
Comments